


Wing dad

by GremGoblin



Category: Dream Daddy: A Dad Dating Simulator
Genre: Also this is 3 years after Amanda's party, And Lucien’s in college, But Ernest gets a girlfriend, But I like spinch too much, Cottage core, Did I really put weird Gen Z slang in there?, Everyone in Maple bay apparent loves to skate, F/M, I am so sorry, I tagged underaged just in case but everything is just implied, I was going to name him Peter, M/M, So all the kids are teenagers, Spooky, Try and failing to bond with your boyfriend’s son, Well not all of kids, Why Did I Write This?, Yes my Dad’s name is spinch, but a lot, parenting is hard, roller skating, yay, yes i did
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-03-29
Updated: 2020-03-29
Packaged: 2021-03-01 03:54:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,228
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23368777
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GremGoblin/pseuds/GremGoblin
Summary: Parenting isn't easy, but it's even harder when you're trying to help your boyfriend’s teenage son navigate through the horror that is dating in high school.
Relationships: Hugo Vega/Dadsona
Comments: 3
Kudos: 15





	Wing dad

**Author's Note:**

> So I blame 3 things for this, the comments on the ”Say So.” lyric video, Cottage core TikToks, and the 1990 movie dog fight starring River Phoenix.

I consider myself to be a cool dad. I took Amanda to a bar for her 21st birthday, and I let her drink two alcoholic beverages. I sleep in on Saturdays. I've been to Wrestlemania with Hugo twice. By all intents and purposes, I'm pretty cool.

So I don't know why Ernest calls me a loser. I've been dating his father for three years, and still doesn't like me. I mean, he doesn't hate me but doesn't respect me either.

So when I was up at 3 am this morning, and I saw Duchess Cordelia chase a shadow figure from Ernest’s room to the front door, I knew something was wrong. 

Now, if I had been marathoning paranormal ice road truckers, I would've shaken it off as just a ghost. But, that night Hugo and I went to see a movie with Damien. And since Lucien was home from college on a mental health break because his band broke up, he was watching Ernest. By the time we came home at 11, Lucien had already gone home because Ernest fell asleep. So we knew something wasn't right, but we chose to ignore it and go to bed. So now that the all-knowing Duchess Cordelia found a shadow creature in Ernest room, I think I figured it out.

”Ernest, is everything okay in there, buddy?” I ask, playing dumb to earn his trust. I stand outside his door, ready to bust in at any time.

”I’m fine, douchenozzle.” He yells, and with that queue, I kick the door open.

”That is Mr.Douchenozzle to you.” I proudly announce as I enter. And then as I look around, I started to regret entering his room.

There is clothing all over the floor, clothing which obviously, doesn't belong to Ernest.There is a dress, a cardigan, and a blouse on the floor. There is a woven purse on his desk with a pair of round glasses and a bunch of tiny trinkets spilling out of it. And the biggest OSHA violation of them all is the fact Ernest is shirtless. I have known this child for three years, from the ages of 14 to 17, not once have I saw him without a hoodie. ”So, who’s is this?” I ask, making a vague gesture around the room.

”It’s mine!” He yells defensively, as he pulls his covers up to his chest. I look down at my feet to find a driver's license. There's a picture of a girl with short wavy brown hair, and glasses named Hadley Dupin. I pick up the ID off of the floor.

“You know, the whole point of a fake ID is for it to look like you, and not be your age, right?” I tease, and he gets up, thank God he's wearing boxers, and he snatches the license out of my hands.

”What? Are you going to tell my dad about this?” he hisses as he puts Hadley’s ID with her things on his desk. I can't help but feel bad for the kid. I know he's probably just hiding this girl because he doesn't trust us, and It kind of hurts. I know what it's like to not be able to trust your parents, and it's awful.

”Ernest, listen, I'm not a narc.” I joke, trying to break the ice, and I almost get him to smile. ”I won't tell Hugo anything about this. Under two conditions.” I lean against his door frame, and he rolls his eyes.

”Mr.Sprimkle, I can’t get you any weed. I had a falling out with my dealer, and now I'm kind of blacklisted from the real dealers, and Lucien just sells oregano.” he sighs, and I just stare at him confused.

”Good to know, but that wasn't what I was going to ask you for.” I say awkwardly, and he stares at me with wide eyes. ”I’m not going to tell Hugo about that because now you can't do drugs anymore, so who cares.” I shrug, and he sighs in relief. ”The one favor I do ask is that you one, use protection.” I say.

”I’m not stupid, I tripled wrapped it.” he nonchalantly says, and I just stare at him in pure terror.There was this unknown mix of shock and confusion in my soul in response to his words.

”That is not how condoms work, Ernest.” I respond as I look at him with heavy concern. ”We’ll talk about that later. Right now, I want to tell you about the last condition.” I say,trying to get into cool dad mode. ”You take this girl on an actual date.” Ernest just starts laughing.

”That was good Mr.Sprimpkle, you almost had me for a second.” He sighs,jumping on his bed.

”Ernest, I wasn't joking.” I shoot him a concerned look, and he starts getting uncomfortable.

”As much as I like Hadley, I can't be seen with her.” he laughs, and I feel thoroughly disgusted at this situation.

”But you can sleep with her? Ernest, do you realize how awful of a person you're being? Who raised you? Because it clearly wasn't Hugo, and as much of a jerk your other father is, there is no way he would act this evil.” As I talk, I can see Ernest’s tough facade start to crack.

”Alright, I'm highkey into Hadley ok! Is that what you want to hear? I'm a Simp for the softest girl in school!” I understand less than half of that, but I think I have a general understanding of it.

”Why does that matter if she makes you happy? High school isn't forever. You shouldn't let people you'll probably never see again control your happiness.” I sigh. I’m trying my hardest to summon my best parental advice, and I sincerely hope that I somehow get through to this kid. 

”I guess you're right.” Ernest mutters. I try not to smile as I stop leaning on the door frame. 

”Well, if you keep your end of the bargain, I'll keep mine. Goodnight Ernest.” I say before closing the door.

I feel like I'm too blindly trusting Ernest to do the right thing, but he's not a completely bad kid. He has a lot of wrinkles to iron out, but Duchess Cordelia has helped a lot, and maybe this Hadley girl will too.

I walk down the hallway to Hugo's room, and the door to him half-awake waiting for me in bed. I smile as I shut the door behind me.

”What was Cordelia barking at?” he asks as I slip into bed next to him. He always looks so handsome, whether he's dressed up or not. There something about him just existing, no matter what state that just makes me so happy.

”Ernest was hoarding pizza rolls under his bed again.” I kiss him. Even after three years, I still can’t get over how nice his mustache feels against my skin.

”He never learns does he.” Hugo shakes his head. I brush a stray piece of hair out of his face.

”No he does not.” I yawn before we start staring at each other Contently. ”You know we should probably get to sleep.” I chuckle.

”You're probably right.” He smiles as he tenderly pushes my hair out of the way, and kisses my forehead. We drift asleep soundly in each other's arms.

**Author's Note:**

> So I named Hadley after Hemingway's favorite wife, for funsies


End file.
